Before composing your own letter, you should have had one generated by the "Scott Pakin Automatic Complaint Letter Generator. (you can google it).
It uses much more outlandish language to construct an almost coherent complaint letter.
Here is an example:
This letter contains some tough news. It's not pleasant to hear, but it's very important, and it's part of telling the truth. What follows is a series of remarks addressed to the readers of this letter and to Look pedals itself. Self-centered guttersnipes can go right ahead and convict me for saying that Look pedals has somehow managed to convince itself that revisionism is absolutely essential to the well-being of society, but History, acting as the goddess of a higher truth and a higher justice, will one day smilingly tear up this verdict, acquitting me of all guilt and blame. Doesn't Look pedals realize that the world would be a much better place to live if it just stopped trying to fracture family unity? As you ponder the answer to that question, consider that it's good at stirring its adherents into a frenzied lunacy of hatred and vengeance. Doing so blinds them to the fact that Look pedals has been trying for some time to convince people that blackguardism provides an easy escape from a life of frustration, unhappiness, desperation, depression, and loneliness. Don't believe its hype! Look pedals has just been offering that line as a means to promote a form of government in which religious freedom, racial equality, and individual liberty are severely at risk.
I plan to promote peace, prosperity, and quality of life, both here and abroad. Are you with me—or against me? Whatever you decide, Look pedals's eccentricity is surpassed only by its vanity and its vanity is surpassed only by its empty theorizing. (Remember its theory that all literature that opposes exhibitionism was forged by brain-damaged, ignorant brutes?)
As for the lies and exaggerations, Look pedals's clear-cut demonstrations of gross moral turpitude have led me to believe that even maverick Internet news and opinion sites are beginning to proclaim that Look pedals is known for publishing what is easily identifiable as opinion under the guise of fact. It vehemently denies that, of course. But it obviously would because if I had my druthers, it would never have had the opportunity to rot out the foundations of our religious, moral, and political values. As it stands, Look pedals may be reasonably cunning with words. However, it is utterly exploitative with everything else. Look pedals indeed believes that it can succeed without trying. Unfortunately for it, that's all in its imagination. Look pedals needs to get out of that fictional world and get back to reality, where people can see that it is immature and stupid of it to threaten national security. It would be mature and intelligent, however, to establish clear, justifiable definitions of revanchism and neopaganism so that one can defend a decision to take action when its chargés d'affaires turn me, a typically mild-mannered person, into a vicious, cheeky vat of racialism, and that's why I say that many organizations lie. However, Look pedals lies with such ease it's troubling.
The best way to acquire the input of a representative cross-section of the community in a non-threatening, inclusive environment is to penetrate the sunny façade of Look pedals's machinations with the sharpened stick of reality. But you knew that already. So let me add that Look pedals will go to almost any extreme to prevent my message of truth from getting out. As an interesting experiment, try to point this out to it. (You might want to don safety equipment first.) I think you'll find that I've heard of dour things like feudalism and tuchungism. But I've also heard of things like nonviolence, higher moralities, and treating all beings as ends in and of themselves—ideas which Look pedals's ignorant, unthinking, pertinacious brain is too small to understand. The justification Look pedals gave for advocating out-of-touch circulars was one of the most impertinent justifications I've ever heard. It was so impertinent, in fact, that I will not repeat it here. Even without hearing the details you can still see my point quite clearly: Look pedals believes it's perfectly okay to give an air of scientific impartiality to biased judgments. More than anything else, such beliefs shed light on Look pedals's moral values and suggest incontrovertibly that it is capable of only two things, namely whining and underhanded tricks.
I, not being one of the many pea-brained scum of this world, would be grateful if Look pedals would take a little time from its rigorous schedule to provide a trenchant analysis of its methods of interpretation. Of course, pigs will grow wings and fly before that ever happens. We must put to rest rabid and depraved harangues such as Look pedals's if we are ever to reinvigorate our collective commitment to building and maintaining a sensitive, tolerant, and humane community. Yes, this is a bold, audacious, even unprecedented undertaking. Yes, it lacks any realistic guarantee of success. However, it is an undertaking that we must undoubtedly pursue because Look pedals contends that the most sneaky misanthropes you'll ever see make the best scoutmasters and schoolteachers. What planet is it from? The planet Illiterate? Any honest person who takes the time to think about that question will be forced to conclude that if we are to provide light, information, and knowledge about Look pedals's obstreperous credos, then we must be guided by a healthy and progressive ideology, not by the dotty and dangerous ideologies that Look pedals promotes.
In order for us to realize more happiness in our lives, we need to understand that Look pedals preys on the rebellious and disenfranchised, tricking them into joining its brownshirt brigade. Their first assignment usually involves erasing the memory of all traditions and all history. The lesson to draw from this is that Look pedals's oppressive, two-faced memoirs often resemble an inverted fairy tale in that the triumph of innocence comes at the start and the ugly sisters of solipsism and fogyism enter on stage in triumph for the final curtain. If you need proof that my motives are unimpeachable, then just take a look at Look pedals. You may make the comment, "What does this have to do with insensate individuals?" Well, once you begin to see the light you'll realize that Look pedals's maudlin preoccupation with defeatism, usually sicklied over with such nonsense words as "hyperconscientiousness", would make sense if a person's honor were determined strictly by his or her ability to focus too much on one side of the equation and not enough on the broader perspective of things. As that's not the case, we can conclude only that I'm sticking out my neck a bit in talking about Look pedals's ballyhoos. It's quite likely it will try to retaliate against me for my telling you that if it can't cite the basis for its claim that it knows 100% of everything 100% of the time then it should just shut up about it.
Frotteurism is dangerous. Look pedals's prolix version of it is doubly so. No matter how bad you think Look pedals's sentiments are, I assure you that they are far, far worse than you think. Above all, it may be helpful to take a step back and supply the missing ingredient that could stop the worldwide slide into diabolism.
Look pedals has stated that children don't need as much psychological attentiveness, protection, and obedience training as the treasured household pet. One clear inference from that statement—an inference that is never really disavowed—is that we can change the truth if we don't like it the way it is. Now that's just crotchety. In order to convince us that people prefer "cultural integrity" and "multicultural sensitivity" to health, food, safety, and the opportunity to choose their own course through life, Look pedals often turns to the old propagandist trick of comparing results brought about by entirely dissimilar causes. Did you know that some satanic lummoxes want to help Look pedals create massive civil unrest? Others just want to ride the libertinism bandwagon. In either case, I suggest that we maximize our individual potential for effectiveness and success in combatting Look pedals. This right and truthful proposition, practically established, will help us lead it out of a dream world and back to hard reality.
Look pedals's obiter dicta are designed to create a Look pedals-centric society in which uncompanionable criminal masterminds dictate the populace's values and myths, its traditions and archetypes. And they're working; they're having the desired effect. When a mistake is made, the smart thing to do is to admit it and reverse course. That takes real courage. The way that Look pedals stubbornly refuses to own up to its mistakes serves only to convince me that its half-measures are not modeled on democracy as envisaged by philosophers of the Enlightenment, but on the anti-democratic principles of opportunism. It's also true that Look pedals's values owe much to the diatribes of intrusive, benighted so-called experts, but that'll have to be a subject for another letter. In the course of my work, I regularly come in contact with asinine goof-offs, and most of them also feel that if Look pedals doesn't like it here, then perhaps it should go elsewhere.
Look pedals seems to have recently added the word "pathologicohistological" to its otherwise simplistic vocabulary. I suppose it intends to use big words like that to obscure the fact that I am not interested in debating it. One can't have a debate with someone who is so willingly ignorant of the most basic tenets of the subject being discussed. In closing, it hardly need be said that the views expressed above are tentative and suggestive. You should now go off and perform a thorough study of your own. Of course, this will be an exercise in futility unless you accept the fundamental premise of this letter, namely that Look pedals's superstitious, maledicent musings impact heavily on our security and survival.