Riding with weaker/beginner riders (road) and patience

[bricky21]

Proceed with caution . Why does she want to ride with you ie what are her goals? You can't come up with a good plan until you answer that.

[MarkTwain]

The bigger question is does your girlfriend realize you're decrying her sporting prowess on an internet forum! No doubt you'll correct me if I'm wrong (though I'm pretty sure I'm not..) but are you not the lad who recently pulled a sickie off work, went for a ride on your bike, logged the ride on Strava and then posted on WW looking for advice when you're boss found out?! Well I reckon the maelstrom of sh*t you faced back then will be nothing compared to what'll happen if your gf finds out about this post!!!!

He was

I'm guessing one more page before this is reported for the admins to also remove

[Ozrider]

I ride with my wife and 6 year old son on my road bike. I treat it as a family outing. I either go for a training ride before or afterwards.
While riding with them I spin high cadence, and enjoy the ride.
Being with them increases their confidence, they are both riding further and further.
Sometimes in life it's not about you, but what you are doing to help someone else improve


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[Devon]

It's really sad that there are people here who feel the need to turn this into a slagging match. Go do something more constructive with your time. The aim of this post was to gain opinions - of which I have recieved many helpful insights - as to how riding with her can be made easier (for her) and more enjoyable for myself. If it is more enjoyable for me then I can better help her have fun and get fitter. I don't recall ever "decrying her sporting prowess".

Lighten up people.

For those who had something constructive to say, thanks you. You have been very helpful.

[jekyll man]

As ozrider and a few others have said, it's not about you.
Let your gf make the call as to where she wants to go, cafe area or wherever.
Let her lead the ride
Just tagalong and just ride with her. Look at the things ou normally ride passed with your eyes shut.

I'm sure you're not at a level where every ride must be a training ride so just chill a bit

[Devon]

As ozrider and a few others have said, it's not about you.

See my third post:

I am only riding for her and not myself

Not quite sure where people have got the idea that I'm forcing anything here. She wants to ride, asks me to come along, I take time out to do so becuase I want to spend time with her and help her ride.

[jekyll man]

If you're riding around in circles or doing intervals, she will think that she is slowing you down, stopping you doing what you want to do, and not what she wants :-/

Let her figure out riding without a constant barrage of "advice" and just go along for the ride...

Also see if there's any other local girls she can tagalong with, so she can build her confidence as much as anything. Most females I've ridden with have a fear of testosterone fuelled rides, no matter how many people they know on them, and their assurances.

.....and chill

[Devon]

That's exactly my worry and why I haven't been riding off doing reps/intervels thus far. Annoyingly that may be worse, becuase on the climbs she always says "go on and I'll meet you at the top". Which defeats the point of us riding together!

Good call re: finding girls however I only know two female riders and one is pro, the other is a semi-pro XC racer so that throws that one out of the window... I could however ask around the local clubs.

I do know a few people she could maybe ride with but she'll still want to ride with me on weekends. I think it's just a case of me adjusting and getting used to it - something that will come with time. It should also be easier once it warms up a little...

[MarkTwain]

It's really sad that there are people here who feel the need to turn this into a slagging match. Go do something more constructive with your time. The aim of this post was to gain opinions - of which I have recieved many helpful insights - as to how riding with her can be made easier (for her) and more enjoyable for myself. If it is more enjoyable for me then I can better help her have fun and get fitter. I don't recall ever "decrying her sporting prowess".

Lighten up people.

For those who had something constructive to say, thanks you. You have been very helpful.

And here comes the indignation.

Again.

As jekyll man said

.....and chill

[Devon]

That's the point I was trying to make, yet must have failed.

I've gained what I needed from this post so will end it here before the pointless bickering goes any further. Thanks to those who helped, really appreciate the input. Hopefully things will improve with time and she will get fitter and maybe in the summer we will be putting in some decent mileage together around the moors.

End of topic.

[dogg]

suck it up and just be happy you're able to be out on the bike with your lady? maybe work on your patience?

i really don't mean to come across as harsh but this seems like a pretty trivial thing to be bothered by, id be stoked to find a partner willing to ride with me - no matter how slow.

[DanW]

Not quite sure where people have got the idea that I'm forcing anything here. She wants to ride, asks me to come along, I take time out to do so because I want to spend time with her and help her ride.

When the thread is worded as to how you can make these boring rides better for you it is reasonable for people to suggest you to chill out and have fun and put your partners feelings above your own. You said yourself she enjoys them but you are the one with the problem:

I meant more for improving these rides for myself. She has no issue with them but I get frustrated and bored very quickly with the pace.

If she enjoys being out on the bike and exploring a little and having a cafe stop then there is absolutely no problem with that. The fact you find it boring is why others have suggested the attitude adjustment is perhaps the easiest solution.

Everything reads as though riding with your partner is a major inconvenience. You may not have intended it to read like that but that is how it comes across. Acid test is to get her opinion on your feelings presented here when she reads your posts. Nothing is taken out of context but does not read well at all (even if that was not your intention when writing):

She's really weak on the bike

Going at such a pace I get cold and fed up quickly

Does anyone have any hints/tips/techniques for making rides like these easier or more enjoyable (for myself)?

it's hard becuase I have never been that that level; having ridden bikes since I was a small child, so struggle to relate.

I'm going to have a chat with her about it tonight.

I genuinely believe she's getting stronger, but I think she lacks the aggressiveness required to advance properly with road riding

On hills and when the wind/rain picks up she'll stick it in the small ring and spin, whereas for me that's where I get stuck in and power through.

My main concern is that if I'm doing drills or messing around on it while she is riding she will feel disheartened as it will reinforce her belief that she is 'holding me up' (despite the fact I am only riding for her and not myself).

[spud]

Didn't read the whole thread but I dealt with this when my wife first started riding. Key is to make sure you do a hard workout BEFORE you ride with her, then you'll feel very happy to tootle along at 12 mph. Get yourself a turbo trainer and bang out a serious interval set, then ride with her.

BTW, my wife is now a very strong cyclist who does the A level club rides. Be patient, and encourage your partner, and she'll enjoy it.

[russianbear]

It's a shame you can't cruise around and enjoy riding, chatting together. Use the time to strengthen your relationship, it's a wonderful hobby to share. You're not going pro, so just relax like everyone else said. Your partner is worth more than winning some silly amateur bike race. Perspective.

[nathanong87]

and imagine this is how pros feel when they do group rides with peasants like us.